I shouldn't love you but i want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but i can't move
I can't look away
And i dont know how to be fine when i'm not
Cause i don't know how to make the feelings stop
Just so you know
This feelings takin control
Of me and i can't help it
I wont sit around
I can't let him win now
Though you should know
I've tryed my best to let go of you
But i don't want to
I just gutta say it all before you go
Just so you know
It's gettin hard to
Be around you
Theres so much i can't say
And do you want me to hide the feelings
And look away
This emptyness is killin me
I'm wonderin why i've waited so long
Lookin back i realize it was always there to be spoken
Now i'm waitin here
Been waitin here
This song totally fits into what Im feeling now and wants to day.
Im always waiting and Im wiling to is because love is patient.
I feeling so fucked up now...
"The Way I Do"
Always thought I would stand on my own
Climb a mountain top all alone
Relying, depending on no one
Now look at what you've done
Now I can't go on without you
I'm not that strong without you
Never thought I could love you
the way I do.
Never thought I could need you
Never thought I could want you
The way I do
Thursday, October 30, 2008
how does it feel
when you dont know who to turn to for help
when you dont know what to do
when you dont know how to make yourself cry out feeling numbed
and soon the warn very warm tears truttle down my cheeks.. non stop..
the hurt starts to surface.. the pain increases as minutes passes by..
what can i do?
whats love? 5 years ago i felt this pain.. and swear that I never want to feel this pain ever ever again and now.. 5 years later.. this pain returns..
Friday, October 24, 2008
o tt boss has so much of high mentality, highly ENGLISH educated and so much for HIGHCLASS
everymeeting he seems to HINT ON ONE THING : interns = students = lazy
i mean like wtf about comparing factory workers about them being low class & low mentality.
PLEASE OK, your damn SHIRT/TIE/PANTS/UNDERWEAR you wear everyday, are done by these factory workers who work day and night for those little money. YOU CALL THEM LOW MENTALITY? do you even know how to make a shirt? or EVEN SEW?
what do you mean come work on time and rushes off when the bell rings? DO YOU EVEN KNOW WE HAVE BEEN STARTING WORK AT 930 & ENDS AT 530. im fucking not complaining that staying till 6pm is a problem BUT NOT when you ASSUME WITH YOUR ONE LOOK FACE that we SUPPOSED TO END AT 6 and rush like mad, we got our own lives after WORK OKAY, get it ? he also not paying us any OT $ or whatever
So what if you are rich, so what if you are a boss? SO WHAT,big ah , pls my NEH bigger ok? do you go home and spend them with your children and understand the life of a teenage/young adult? or you go home and show them your one-look face and say yes/ok/no and go to your studyroom at home? so what if you drive a damn BMW? my dad drives a Nissan Ceifero & recently just upgraded again although its not as EXPENSIVE, it is SMOOTHER, MORE SPACIOUS & A LOVING MAN IS DRIVING it.
how much can we do at the office?
when we pick calls , must transfer, cannot do quoting, ask us to observe how our mentors are dealing with customer and 2 to 1 mentor, then customers starts to us:"training your new staff?" so embarressing why? because we are sitting right beside our mentor with a stool and watching every action they do, observing k. then ask us to stand discreetly if there is no space PLEASE LOR you STAND THERE already very obvious like hawking on the mentor & customer, stand behind cannot see, stand beside customers stares. then what you want us to do?
and we been busy RESEARCHING ON VARIOUS DESTINATIONS to find out what WE DO NOT KNOW and he ASSUME (once again) that we are PRETENDING TO BE BUSY. at least we bother to do some work on our own at office okay.
oh yea, i think he also needs to visit a doctor, getting SENILE, repeating whatever he says over and over again FROM A -B-C THEN C-B-A on and on for an hour , VERY POWERFUL lor. and worst still he will either play with his fingers or a pen when speaking to us like damn irritating can. He speaks with one tone & one expression, once in a while, laugh at meaningless stuff. HEHE
and its goes OVER AND OVER AND OVER again, please lah our ass pain ok.
p/s if you ever read this, whatever comes out of YOUR DAMN MOUTH, hopefully you dont ever ever had to eat your OWN WORDS cos you are a bloody chinese yet YOU DONT UNDERSTAND OR READ CHINESE, THROW CHINESE FACE.
& wait auntie uncle very low class meh? very lowly educated meh? please lor look at the mirror YOUR WRINKLES AND SAGGY SKIN , ah peh already also dont know.
everymeeting he seems to HINT ON ONE THING : interns = students = lazy
i mean like wtf about comparing factory workers about them being low class & low mentality.
PLEASE OK, your damn SHIRT/TIE/PANTS/UNDERWEAR you wear everyday, are done by these factory workers who work day and night for those little money. YOU CALL THEM LOW MENTALITY? do you even know how to make a shirt? or EVEN SEW?
what do you mean come work on time and rushes off when the bell rings? DO YOU EVEN KNOW WE HAVE BEEN STARTING WORK AT 930 & ENDS AT 530. im fucking not complaining that staying till 6pm is a problem BUT NOT when you ASSUME WITH YOUR ONE LOOK FACE that we SUPPOSED TO END AT 6 and rush like mad, we got our own lives after WORK OKAY, get it ? he also not paying us any OT $ or whatever
So what if you are rich, so what if you are a boss? SO WHAT,big ah , pls my NEH bigger ok? do you go home and spend them with your children and understand the life of a teenage/young adult? or you go home and show them your one-look face and say yes/ok/no and go to your studyroom at home? so what if you drive a damn BMW? my dad drives a Nissan Ceifero & recently just upgraded again although its not as EXPENSIVE, it is SMOOTHER, MORE SPACIOUS & A LOVING MAN IS DRIVING it.
how much can we do at the office?
when we pick calls , must transfer, cannot do quoting, ask us to observe how our mentors are dealing with customer and 2 to 1 mentor, then customers starts to us:"training your new staff?" so embarressing why? because we are sitting right beside our mentor with a stool and watching every action they do, observing k. then ask us to stand discreetly if there is no space PLEASE LOR you STAND THERE already very obvious like hawking on the mentor & customer, stand behind cannot see, stand beside customers stares. then what you want us to do?
and we been busy RESEARCHING ON VARIOUS DESTINATIONS to find out what WE DO NOT KNOW and he ASSUME (once again) that we are PRETENDING TO BE BUSY. at least we bother to do some work on our own at office okay.
oh yea, i think he also needs to visit a doctor, getting SENILE, repeating whatever he says over and over again FROM A -B-C THEN C-B-A on and on for an hour , VERY POWERFUL lor. and worst still he will either play with his fingers or a pen when speaking to us like damn irritating can. He speaks with one tone & one expression, once in a while, laugh at meaningless stuff. HEHE
and its goes OVER AND OVER AND OVER again, please lah our ass pain ok.
p/s if you ever read this, whatever comes out of YOUR DAMN MOUTH, hopefully you dont ever ever had to eat your OWN WORDS cos you are a bloody chinese yet YOU DONT UNDERSTAND OR READ CHINESE, THROW CHINESE FACE.
& wait auntie uncle very low class meh? very lowly educated meh? please lor look at the mirror YOUR WRINKLES AND SAGGY SKIN , ah peh already also dont know.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
its not that Im petty or demanding
its just
if you know you have a meeting, tell me
if you know you will be late, inform me
if you know that I will get pissed knowing the above tell me EARLIER.
im always the devil, its ok shall get by it.
some know how patient I am but when my time is so limited.. can you blame me for flaring up?
oh im so hating work work work .
i need a change of environment .
but can the interns remain my colleuges.
i hate it when momoren BUZIDONG, we knock off at 0530 and meeting till 6 :(
quote of the day:"the very big fat tree trunks are chopped and elephants had to pull therockslogs"
its just
if you know you have a meeting, tell me
if you know you will be late, inform me
if you know that I will get pissed knowing the above tell me EARLIER.
im always the devil, its ok shall get by it.
some know how patient I am but when my time is so limited.. can you blame me for flaring up?
oh im so hating work work work .
i need a change of environment .
but can the interns remain my colleuges.
i hate it when momoren BUZIDONG, we knock off at 0530 and meeting till 6 :(
quote of the day:"the very big fat tree trunks are chopped and elephants had to pull the
Monday, October 20, 2008
- work seriously sucks & WORST, SHIFTS has started like wtf :(
- this week is morning next week is afternoon :(
- everyday meals is like caifan with less half rice :(
- everyday have to see those people tt i seriously detest :(
- everynight before i fall asleep, i feel so good cursing them:)
- now my day is not day and night is not night. :(
- wtf when he say we will get involve with sundays when it is my only day with BABYBOY:(
- i fucking hate that place, i curse and swear with that area:(
- yes im unhappy with everything, im trying my best to get by each day:(
- 95 fucking days - 12 OFFdays - hopefully public holidays = 83 days - pls minus public holidays
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Thursday, October 16, 2008
My one and only graduation I had was IN SEC 4, and it wasnt really a great experience because all the years graduates have their graduation at a hotel booked by the school however this year, it was in the school , organised by the student leaders.
Although its in school:) the girls and guys turned up in gorgeous pieces of dressing and got high on our own:) it was fun having the last biggest gathering together among 6-8 classes. Who knows when I will see them again:)
I watch shows on graduations and always love the result of it, people who knows me know I could watch High School Musical over and over again, singing over and over again. NOW they are having graduation ! omg i saw their movie trails during advertisement of other movies and at CATHAY i cant wait. Hopefully, Nuffnang will bring me go!
You want to know the real happy wildest way of graduation with hot babes&hunks and best music to add to the beat? ?
Then you got to Catch Walt Disney Pictures' High School Musical 3: Senior Year in cinemas from October 24!
Although its in school:) the girls and guys turned up in gorgeous pieces of dressing and got high on our own:) it was fun having the last biggest gathering together among 6-8 classes. Who knows when I will see them again:)
I watch shows on graduations and always love the result of it, people who knows me know I could watch High School Musical over and over again, singing over and over again. NOW they are having graduation ! omg i saw their movie trails during advertisement of other movies and at CATHAY i cant wait. Hopefully, Nuffnang will bring me go!
You want to know the real happy wildest way of graduation with hot babes&hunks and best music to add to the beat? ?
Then you got to Catch Walt Disney Pictures' High School Musical 3: Senior Year in cinemas from October 24!
Saturday, October 11, 2008
damn the vomiting of 6-7 times and diarrhoea 5-6 times
that made my body totally weak, and lifeless.
bad headaches, giddyspells, discomfort.
Doctor even said I have intestine cramps.
howwww freak the painnn.
They sent me off :) on 3 oct , accompanied when the 1225 flight was cancelled and accompanied me till 3+ .
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Life is good:)
Sun is hot:D
Looking at the brighter side of life:]
too many things to be said
too little time to do it and upload all the photos.
Back from PattayaBKKHuaHin
Back to WORK
thats pretty sad
each of us got roughly 100 to 500+ photos, there are 8 of us.
Im going to compile and upload the photos soon:)
inspections with 30+ hotels is enought to scare us from entering another hotel
Till the next one that WOAH us (:
Happypill is so encouraging, thank you!
Arund is so so funny my listening earrr :)
Boyfriend is so way too cute to be handled by my heart.
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Last post before I leave for PATTAYABKKHUAHIN :)
its sweet to know someone is making an effort to come tml :)
Yes the luggage is packed like OMG.
clothes/makeup/cleansers/soaps/many stuff.
yes the flight is 12 25 pm tml at Terminal 1 :)
I know who I will miss, who I will get presents for.
I know who will miss me and show their love for me.
its sweet to know someone is making an effort to come tml :)
Yes the luggage is packed like OMG.
clothes/makeup/cleansers/soaps/many stuff.
yes the flight is 12 25 pm tml at Terminal 1 :)
I know who I will miss, who I will get presents for.
I know who will miss me and show their love for me.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
YAY to Public Hols :] = no work HIAKHIAKHIAK :D
anyway! finally slept till 11+ with some disturbing calls in the morning
Im so going to pack my luggage for my 6d5nights trip to Pattaya,Bkk, HuaHin:)
- hotel inspections
- lunch/dinner with hotel staff
- sightseeing tours
- night tours
- and TONNES TONNES of shoppping time.
meeting baby later in the afternoon while Im packing my stuff now. YES he got some trng thingy like on a PHday.
I want to shop like nobody business :)
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